Someone Else Is Spining The Thread

I am blogging everyday (or nearly everyday) on The Daily Stoic.

The Saxon Series by Bernard Cornwell is one of my favorite fiction series. In every book from the first one to the end; from the Netflix to the end there is a phrase.

“Destiny is all” or “Wyrd biõ ful ãræd.”

The book talks about three weavers under the life tree. They weave the storyline of our life. At any point they could pull out scissors and end it. While the book is fiction I’ve thought a lot about this in life. There is a destiny or fate to life. I’ve often thought about making different decisions or even being in different scenarios in life. A really good example is meeting my wife.

I was with a friend and we decided to head downtown for St. Patrick’s Day. We ran into a school friend of his. About 20 minutes later we parted ways. Another hour or so we left the event to head back to his place. On the way back to his place we noticed the friend he had connected with on the highway going about 70 mph. We both rolled down our window. The car I was in got invited over to their place for drinks. This is where I met my eventual wife.

Had that small piece in time not occurred, I would not be where I am. If either of us had left just 60 seconds later or earlier than we did that moment would never have happened. Destiny is all.

A Higher Power

I am blogging everyday (or nearly everyday) on The Daily Stoic.

There’s a higher power in life. Often people associate this with religion. What if it’s just the fact that I am a tiny tiny spec in the universe. I can only control a very small part of that very tiny tiny spec of our universe. I’ve accepted this and I’ve found myself much more freed from life. I control what I control, everything just is. It’s easier said than done.

In my fantasy football league I tried sliding someone through waivers for a week that I wanted to pick back up. Two days later he was picked up and now out of my control. I feel a small amount of frustration built up inside me. “What the hell?” I have to remind myself that it was the choice I made and there’s nothing more I can do about it. I also, have to keep myself from beating myself up too much for not dropping someone else. The choice came down to two people. I feel now I would have been less disappointed if the other were picked. I try to evaluate what I was thinking at the time. How my biases played a role and what I need to do in the future.

Maybe a worthy use of energy, probably not. I don’t know what the future holds. The guy I let go could go off and I could never see him again or the guy I kept could and then I would be glad for the keep. Life has twists and turns. Sometimes things work in my favor other times they do not. I think that’s the higher power.

Not Good, Nor Bad

I am blogging everyday (or nearly everyday) on The Daily Stoic.

Change is neither good nor bad. It just is. My own feelings towards a change are what make it good or bad. I did not handle the shut down of the world very well. I was angry. I’ve since come around to the change as opportunity. It’s not necessarily a good opportunity. It’s just an opportunity. The last several months I have worked on myself and I’ve found improvements in my life. Going back to the fate and destiny stoic. It wasn’t a good situation, yet it was an opportunity and I think I’m better for it.

Following The Doctor's Orders

I am blogging everyday (or nearly everyday) on The Daily Stoic.

Things happen for a reason. They may not always be what I want but they happen for a reason none the less. I’ve thought about this during key turning points in my life. I didn’t start going down the path of self-improvement until I had the worst six months of my life. It was hell to go through and ultimately made me a better person for it. Something similar happened for me career. I took a job that I knew would be hell. I figured I’d give it two years. Four months in I was looking for a way out. Luckily, an opportunity came and it’s the best career opportunity I’ve had.

Working in security I deal with a lot of nasty things. I often refer to the field as rock kicking. Underneath that rock we don’t know if it’s an ant hill or a zombie or a dragon. I’ve been apart of some nasty stuff. I’ve had long days and nights. Ultimately, it’s made me a better security person because of it. I came out of it battle tested and a much better security person.

Daily Stoic(s)

I am blogging everyday (or nearly everyday) on The Daily Stoic.

Tuesday - You Were Born Good

Our true nature is to help each other. It’s good to hear because that’s a characteristic I try to show people. I can at times stray from that. Maybe that’s the meaning of life, is to always be moving towards the good instead of the bad.

Yesterday - Accepting What Is

Taking things in stride. Looking at unwanted outcomes is an opportunity. Working in security there could be a lot of energy spent of what happened. I can grip and complain about it or I can look ahead and use that energy to address or fix the issue. I learned this very early on when I had a manager tell me, "Nothing we can do about it now. Now is the time to fix it.”

I’ve used that in my professional career and it’s very good advice. Security is a never ending stream of things going or being done wrong. We must see these as learning and growing opportunities.

Today - Binding Our Wishes To What Will Be

Fate. God. Call it what you will. There are things out of our control. I can hope for an outcome, but I can be prepared for a less than ideal outcome. I was not particularly fond of Scouts. One of the positive things I did takeaway was the motto, “Always be prepared.”