I am blogging everyday (or nearly everyday) on The Daily Stoic.

Yesterday - Don’t Tell Yourself Stories

Don’t perform for people. Don’t dominate the conversation. Essentially, put the focus on other people. I’ve always gotten along with people well. The problem was that I could never hold friends. They would get sick of me. Eventually, I figured out that I would perform or go for the laugh instead of focusing on them. That didn’t make others feel great about me. When I started to put the emphasis on the other person, I could tell the difference in how people felt about me. They wanted me around. They wanted to engage.

It’s really hard not talk about my self. I’m a selfish person. We all are. I do have to real myself in. Forget the thing I wanted to get out in a conversation and instead focus in on what the other person was telling me and asking follow up questions. It sometimes feel like being a spy. I can have entire conversations with people. Get to know a lot of information about them and they don’t know anything about me.

Today - Don’t Trust The Senses

I recently became aware that I’m an extrovert. I’ve always thought I leaned towards being an introvert because I liked playing video games. What I missed was that I like playing video games with other people. They really recharge me. I thought it was the game amping me up. Instead it’s the collaboration with other people and communication that really amps me up. I hadn’t discovered this until recently. I’ll go to a happy hour exhausted and leave recharged and energized for the evening. That will lead to problems because I’m not ready for bed. Identifying that though allows me to adjust for it and compensate.